Chapter 5

"Oh god, please tell me I've died," Brie groaned the next morning.
No one answered her.
'What is that disgusting smell' she thought as she tried to stand up. She was a little woozy but managed to get on her feet with the help of the nightstand.
'Maybe this wasn't such a good idea,' she thought flopping back down on the bed resting her pounding head in her hands.
"Well good morning," a familiar voice said startling her.
"What's so good about it?" she asked without looking up. "And what is that god awful smell?"
"Breakfast," Kris replied simply.
"Ugh, I don't think I can eat anything."
"Good, I didn't make you any."
"Oh," she replied surprised.
"I made coffee if you want any," Kris said before turning and leaving the room.

Brie sat there for a minute thinking how strange it was that Kris was giving her the cold shoulder. Hell, he was almost bordering on being mean. She made her way out to the kitchen where she found Kris sitting at the table eating something that resembled eggs and bacon. Her stomach turned at the sight of it and he didn't even look up. She went to the cupboard and took out a mug and poured herself some coffee, not bothering to add milk or sugar. Nope, today she needed it black. Brie took a seat beside Kris at the table.
Silence.
Not their same usual comfortable silence either.
"Kristopher, are you mad at me?" she finally asked.
"No," he replied without looking up.
"Then what's with the cold shoulder?"
He just shrugged.
"Okay, are we going to fight, because I don't think I can handle it right now; my head is pounding and your breakfast is making me nauseous."
"I'm not going to fight with you, and maybe you should have thought about the way you'd feel today before you drank your face off last night."
"So that's why you're mad at me? Because I drank?"
Kris took a deep breath before he spoke again.
"No, I'm mad because you put yourself in a stupid situation and made me look like an ass," he said, mumbling the last part.
Brie didn't respond, but she could feel the tears starting to build.
Kris saw the tears in the beautiful blue eyes of his best friend and immediately felt bad for being so harsh.
He sighed and put his hand over hers. "What happened last night Brie?" he said softly.
"I don't know, I know I usually don't drink but I just...I felt like...I don't know," she said in a deflated tone.
"I don't mean the drinking."
The mood in the room took a somber turn and they both felt it. Brie knew what was coming next and she did not want to relive the previous night; a night she was not proud of. Kris needed to ask about what happened the night before, but fear of what he might hear was almost crippling his ability to speak.
"What happened...upstairs?"
"Oh. Kris I don't really want to talk about it."

How was she supposed to tell him that she was angry with him. Not even angry; pissed.
Pissed and hurt because he was leaving her. After giving up everything she loved to support him and taking so much flack from well, just about everyone their "bizarre" relationship, he was leaving her. After working so hard, for so long to achieve his dream of someday playing in the NHL; a dream she supported, how could she be mad at him now that he was on his way? She didn't know, but she knew she was and her escapade the night before was purely for revenge. She wanted Kris to hurt as much as she was hurting and she knew that any sort of time she spent with Rob would do just that. Kris and Rob hated each other. The truth was, Brie hated Rob too, but she was willing to put that hatred aside for one night if it meant that she would piss Kris off and make him feel as bad as she was feeling. She never expected it to go as far as it did. She was a horrible person and an even worse friend. How exactly was she supposed to tell her best friend that?

"Brie?" the sound of Kris' voice brought her from her own thoughts. "What happened?"
"Nothing happened Kris, can we just drop it?"
"It didn't look like nothing the way you came flying down the stairs! You were crying and you looked like..." he stopped.
"I looked like what?" she asked curiously.
"Did you...did you two...ya know..."
"No," she replied lowering her eyes.
"Did he try?"
Brie nodded her head without looking at him. The tears were flowing now.
Kris lifted her chin, but she refused to make eye contact with him.
"Brie, did he...hurt you?"
"He was so strong and so quick. The bedroom door was barely closed before he pushed me down on the bed and got on top of me," she cried.
Kris's blood was boiling and he could feel the anger rise inside him.
"I was so scared Kris. I kept telling him no but I couldn't get him off me. I faught as hard as I could but he wasn't moving. I think I gave up fighting at some point, I don't know, it's all pretty blurry. I remember him moving to get something out of his pocket and I kneed him in the balls as hard as I could. He rolled off me enough for me to get up and I was just about out the door and he grabbed me by the hair and I kicked him again. He grabbed my shirt and it ripped but I made it out the door. All I could think about was getting away from him and getting to you," she sobbed.
Kris was now on his knees in front of her holding her hands.
"Shhhh," he said wrapping his arms around her. "I'm going to kill him, you know that right?" he whispered into her hair.
"No! I just want to forget it happened."
"Brie, what he did was bordering on illegal. If he had've succeeded..."
"But he didn't and you know damn well what everyone will say. 'Oh, she went up there with him, she must have wanted it'."
"I'm sorry Brie, but I have to ask, why did you go up there with him?"
"Because I'm a horrible, horrible person and a horrible friend. I don't deserve you Kristopher. I don't deserve to be your friend."
Kris hugged her tightly to his body. "Brie, you're not making any sense."
"I can't tell you, I don't want you to think less of me. I don't want you to know how horrible I really am."
He chuckled a little at how ridiculous she was being. He took her face in his hands and said, "how could you even think that? Brie, you're being silly. You are my best friend and I love you. I could never think badly of you."
"You would if you knew the truth."
"Given the fact that you won't tell me, I think I already do."
"You...wait...what?"
"Jeanette told me the truth Brie," he said quietly. "And I can't say that I'm very happy about it. I'm your best friend, and it makes me really angry that you didn't tell me yourself."
Brie was beyond confused. She hadn't told Jeanette anything.
"What exactly did she tell you?"
"She told me that you really liked Rob and that you didn't tell me because I don't like him and you didn't want to hurt me."
"Well you don't like him."
"So it's true?" he asked unable to hide the hurt and disappointment in his voice.
Brie could hardly believe what she was hearing.
"NO! Absolutely not! I despise Rob!"
Now Kris was confused.
"Then why would Jeanette tell me that?"
"I have no idea..."she trailed off. "When did she tell you this?"
"Just after you went upstairs with him. I was on my way up to stop you and she stopped me."
The wheels were turning a mile a minute in Brie's head. She knew that Jeanette was jealous that Rob liked her and didn't give Jeanette the time of day, but she never thought she'd do anything that might intentionally hurt Brie.
"What else did she tell you?"
Kris really didn't want to open this can of worms but he knew he had no choice.
"She said that you've given up everything for me, done everything for me and that I've never done anything for you and now I was leaving. She said that I should let you have something for yourself and that something was Rob."
There was a long pause.
"Is that really the way you feel Brie?"
"No. Yes. Kind of. Ahhhhhhhhh! I hate this!"
"I'm really confused here Brie. What the hell is going on?"
"Everything is just so messed up Kris," Brie said getting up and going back to Kris' bedroom. She flopped herself down on the bed and buried her head in a pillow.
Kris followed her a minute later and sat down on the bed beside her. Instinctively he started caressing her hair just like he did the night before. He knew that was what could always soothe her.
"Brie, we've never lied to each other. We've always been able to tell each other everything, no matter how bad it was. Please tell me what's going on."
"You'll hate me," was the response that was muffled by the pillow.
"I assure you I could never, ever hate you Brie."
She took a deep breath before sitting up cross legged in front of him. The chocolate eyes that were staring back at her almost made her loose her nerve.
"Okay fine, but don't interrupt me because if you make me stop, I'll never get it out and I really, really need to get it out."
Kris took her hands and she closed her eyes, shook her head and blurt it all out.

"Yes, I am so pissed off that you're leaving me. I gave up all the things I loved to do so I could be there for you and what do I get in return? You leave. I honestly don't think that you owe me anything for supporting you, I really don't. I did it because I wanted to, it's just my heart is breaking because my best friend gets to live his dream and I'm left behind. I'm so proud of you because you've worked so hard for this. I want you to go and I want you to do well but I don't want to be left here without you. I have no other friends here because no one understands the relationship we have and now I'm going to be alone. I don't know how to be alone. I've never been alone. We've been together every day of our lives and now all of a sudden you'll be gone and I'm scared. I'm more than scared, I'm terrified! If you go, I have nothing here. I'm so angry that they're taking you away from me and I'm mad at you for wanting to go and it's stupid I know, because this is what we both wanted for you, but now it's reality and I'm clearly not coping with it very well. I am feeling so hurt and I just wanted you to hurt as much as I am so that's why I went upstairs with Rob, because I knew it would piss you off and hurt you and that's what I wanted. I wanted you to feel as bad as I do. I know it makes me a horrible person and an even worse friend and I'm sorry. I know I have no right to be mad, but I am and I'm sorry for that too. I want you to go, and I want you to be as great as I know you can be, and I want you to get to live every dream you have because you deserve it and I want you to know that I really do want that for you. I guess all the times I've thought about you living your dream, I never imagined that it would be without me. I'm sorry Kristopher, I am so, so, so, so, so, sorry for everything. I'm sorry for wanting to hurt you. I'm sorry for being such a drunken idiot. I'm sorry for being such a bitch. I'm sorry for resenting you. I'm sorry for being angry with you for no reason because it's something you have no control of. But most of all, I'm sorry for not being the kind of friend that you've been to me or the kind of friend you deserve. I completely understand if you hate me and never want to talk to me again, but I want you to know that I'm not proud of my actions over the last 24hours, but I am honestly happy for you. You are my best friend and I love you Kristopher. I hope you remember that, always."

There. She said it. It was out there and there was no taking it back. She raised her eyes to look at him and was surprised to see that there were tears on his cheeks. She cracked a little smile when their eyes met; waiting with much anticipation for his reaction to her confession.
He got up off the bed slowly and walked to the door, just like he did the night before. When he got to the door he simply turned around and said, "Go home Brielle."